Jumping through hoops to get back to you – news & thank you

Mariah's Thank you Readers Card

Hi all, thank you all for your patience with me, as I strive to catch up on emails and get some reviews (and giveaways) posted. I appreciate you all and your kindness as so many of you have checked up on me with notes (all over the place) full of concern and well wishes for my husband, my Mother and myself. Thank you all… I am so honored to have met such wonderful caring people from all over this beautiful world of ours! 🙂

jump through hoops for you cardI have been jumping through hoops to get back to you and it hasn’t been an easy go of it here. I believe I’ve repaired everything now on my computer… oh lets start with first things first here huh?

A picture of Mariah Lockwood's MotherAs some of you may recall, back in February my Mother became a paraplegic after back surgery. Thanks to the wonderful people that worked hard with her in physical therapy at Life Care in Longmont, my Mother did manage to get a little bit of movement in one leg, however nothing more than slight sensation to it. I had hopes that she would regain strength and control in the leg or perhaps both legs, but no luck and she cannot put weight on it. She has no movement in her waist and one diaphragm isn’t working, so she speaks very softly now.  My Mother finally was released from her rehabilitation recently (late May, I believe) and she went home.

Closeup of Mom on St Pats Day 2013 in Longmont life care center
My Mother in her wheelchair and her huge brace… being a real good sport as she wears goofy St Pats Day Glasses.

I had promised to come up for a week or so to help my Mother and Father out, in their beautiful Mountain home, here in Colorado.

First I cancelled my going up there for my doctors appointments.

Next we cancelled my date to come up, do to one of my 4 brothers, who was coming up with his wife and 3 children. Mom and I knew it would be too much all at once if I too was up there.

Then came a bunch of tests for my husband’s heart, as a result of my husband going in for his disability (problems, and chronic pain in his back) to get epidural injections to ease the tremendous pain he is in. We finally saved up enough money to pay for the shots for the first time in over a year (he is supposed to get his shots about every 4 months or so, when the last set of injections wear off and the pain gets unbearable again). So many things make it difficult for the two of us, being disabled in chronic pain, and on Social Security Disability… yet, on this side note, I must say that my husband and I are frugal, and that we still are smiling, joking, laughing and friendly through it all… most people wouldn’t know how we struggle, if we were to meet them face to face. For that and for the love we have of life, I am so thankful, even if we struggle just to get medications and we forgo many things in order to just get the essential medications for life itself.

Alas, I rambled again… sorry, I am having bad pain day and it’s hard to control the brain… lol, I spend way too long shopping yesterday as we did our Monthly Grocery shopping in one trip (our usual way, as we wait until we pay our bills to know what we can spend & we budget in our end of the month/begining of the month Doctor appointments and try to figure out our cost for medications).  Something as simple as shopping can really wear out people with disabilities & in chronic pain, like us. But I am proud to say I managed to save us just over $100 on our grocery bill from my working with coupons (store and manufacturer coupons together) and the sales at the store. 🙂 Any-who… back to the main topic and the crazy times we’ve been through here, while I was semi absent from the blog and online stuff…. lol

Back to the main topic at hand

My husband went in for his epidural Steroidal injections in his back and they noticed that not only was his heart beating fast, but that it appeared he was skipping heart beats. So here came testing. The surgeon, for the injections, refused (and rightly so) to work on my husband due to the fact that if he got too close to a nerve his heart would speed up more and it could possibly cause a major heart attack. So instead of getting relief for my husbands back, we were told to ask our Family Doctor for a referral to a Cardiologist.

Instead of a Cardiologist, our doctor had decided to run the tests himself… looking at the results each time saying that he didn’t see anything, and reading the results from the tests saying that things looked fine. Yet he wanted, each time, yet another test “just to make sure” and suddenly our Family Doctors Nurse called very worked up and said we needed to see the Cardiologist ASAP because there was something that showed up in the tests. So once again my visit to my Mother and Fathers house, to help out and visit with my parents, was cancelled, this time we didn’t reschedule the visit, due to concern with what was coming up.

History of my husband’s heart (another side note):

In the past we were sure he had a heart attack, the doctor we had at the time even called an ambulance and had my husband whisked off from his office to the hospital. I insisted that my husband stay overnight, although he wanted to go home that night, the doctor had said that they wanted him to stay to monitor his heart. The next morning, before we could leave, they had my husband take a stress test, he passed and there was no sign of damage etc etc… so he left with a prescription for an acid reducer for his tummy instead? Good old Kaiser Perm. left it as that, just kept my husband on the medications for heartburn.

Well with all the tests they took my husband through they found that not only was that past instance, years ago, a heart attack but that he had damage to his heart, scar tissue. And they found that he needed stints placed ASAP and was ordered not to exert himself in any way as we wait for the Cardiologist to have a clearing in his surgery appointments to squeeze my husband in.

hubby after heart surgery
Yes that Tattooed Man is my dear hubby. Here he is after surgery, He cannot remember this picture or the other one where he modeled for it. Poor baby was talkative but sooooo out of it. My job, keep him still, his back hurt laying still for so long and he kept trying to lift his head, a no no after his type of surgery.

Then my husband had heart surgery, with 4 stints placed in and they are watching another vessel in his heart that is still partially plugged, they decided not to place a stint in there since it would possibly do more damage than good (the stints, weaken the vessels where they are placed as they stretch them out). I took care of my husband, and I was unaware of the time and energy that this would consume, keeping him from stressing and exerting himself, otherwise I had thought that I could work on the blog during this time… I was wrong, and I am so sorry. As he started to heal and had some discomfort due to the surgery and the new medications (one medication, they said is a chemical pace maker and the cause of the discomfort as it “re-trains his heart to a new rhythm.”) And that worried us, but our family doctor didn’t seem too concerned when we told him about it.

Finally the Cardiologist cleared my husband to exercise and exert himself some, but he needs to pay attention to his heart pain. I received a call from my Mother, and reported what the Cardiologist had to say, and my Mother expressed that she was, desperate for one of my haircuts and for me to finally visit them. So I waited until after another doctor appointment a few days later, and I went up to my parents house in the mountains. I had hopes of visiting, helping out my Mother and Father (who is doing so very much, between diapers, picking Mom up to place in the bed and in her new electric wheelchair and turning Mom, to avoid bed soars etc.), I also hoped that I could help add some cheer and laughter (as we always, despite anything Mom is going through, manage to  have a ton of laughs) and of course I wanted to cut my Mothers hair. And I cannot forget that Mom and I had plans of doing some craft like projects together as well.

My Mother and Father in about 2010
My Mother and Father in about 2010, before my Mothers illnesses started making it hard for her to eat. Autoimmune problems, they assume.

When I went up to my parents house, I fought the temptation to cry so hard as my Mother is losing weight again and she was having trouble finding words while she was talking, she was so very very drowsy, and super pale.

Day 2 at my Parents House, we got Mom up out of bed for the first time, since I arrived around Noon the day before. I brushed Mom’s hair, and found her lipstick, which I helped her apply and we waited on her haircut since the Home Care Nurse was coming again that day to check up on Mom, checking her blood pressure, heart beats per minute and origination. Come to find out, the nurse had been there the day before and was concerned enough to schedule to follow up the day after. Well Mom didn’t look well to her either and her blood pressure was way too low, her oxygen and beats per minute didn’t look good either so she called the On Call Doctor at my Mothers Doctors office, who was told not only her vitals but the fact that she was so pale she was sort of grey… the doctor said we should go to the Emergency Room right away (by the way, this is a regular thing for my Mother as of late, since she became paralyzed and since she’s been home from her rehabilitation stay, she’s been in the ER a few times, already.)

Dad, Mom and I decided to go to Good Samaritan Hospital, instead of her usual visit to either Boulder Community or Longmont Hospital to see if they not only could help her with the weakness of the heartbeat, blood pressure etc… but to help her and figure out her muscles spasms and terrible pain in one side just at or below the ribs on the one side, which the other hospitals and Mom’s doctors couldn’t help with. Dad and I stayed in the ER as they ran tests, and found phneumonia in her chest, and we waited and waited for them to take her to her hospital room in the ICU. Finally we gave up at about midnight and apologized to Mom who was encouraging us to leave.

Dad and I stayed up talking until about 2 or 3 am in the morning and the next morning we had breakfast at home and then took off right away to the hospital to stay with Mom. This continued until it was the day that I needed to leave to give my husband his Testosterone Shot (yup, saving money on AARP Medicare since this is cheaper than the creme and last year we both hit the doughnut hole, and his was easily hit mid year thanks to the Testosterone Creme).

Mom, is finally home as of a few days ago now, she’s still a little bit out of it but not searching for her words as much. I am home, and had to play catch up on yard etc for a day and then finally I got a chance to log onto my computer and found out that although I was receiving emails, they hadn’t been sending out since this whole thing started in May or June!!!! OMG! Panic, stress AGAIN. Well, searching and searching for a solution, I failed to find any virus, trojan, malware, shareware, etc on my computer, as I used a multitude of programs that I had downloaded over a year ago to my computer. I was thankful that I had Carbonite on my PC so that if I could pinpoint the time of problems I could start over fresh on the computer, just reinstalling programs and the rest of the data would be safe and sound. I was about to use Carbonite for the 2nd time since I subscribed to it a year back (just after I lost everything with my harddrive and then a crash last summer), when I suddenly decided to install a program (that I still had the execute file in my downloads, thankfully since I couldn’t access the internet, or download from it with anything but on my little iPad.) lo and behold, installing a few programs over themselves (Thunderbird for email and firefox for my browsing) and suddenly everything started to work again.

stressed is desserts spelled backward
*sigh* And I’ve gained weight through all this time… time to lose the 7 lbs that I still have (of the 10 lbs I gained) left from my gaining weight. Yup stress eating… my main problem.

Looking at my 4 days of trying to fix the computer problems on my own, we found that it was a shared .dll file that was deleted when I got rid of a program or was corrupted that caused the problem. Yay problem solved! Well, I am almost all settled back in at home and almost have everything caught up from time out taking care of others etc… I am getting back here. We have doctors appointments coming up again this week and next, so a few days away as the doctors visits are quite a ways away from home, but I am back and getting into the swing of things slowly but surely.

I wish to thank you all for your patience as life and loved ones take priority over the blog, and thank you for your patience as I catch up on my emails, my reviews and my giveaways here. I appreciate all the notes to me, to make sure things were okay here, you are too kind my beautiful followers! And I wish to welcome all the new followers to the blog as well, how sweet of you all to come on over and join me and a big thanks to Joan, my friend and former blogging partner for sending over some of her readers to my blog… btw Joan’s up and running with reviews and giveaways again and though she too is going through a lot at home with her chronic pain (lupus SLE and Fibromyalgia just like me) and family stuff, she has the strength and somehow manages to have many great reviews and giveaways up and running on her site. Check out Joan’s blog: http://joans5starreviews.com/

Just don’t forget to come back here soon, as I will be attempting to write  up the newest winners, reviews and giveaways for you all to enjoy! Watch your email (for the subscribers), the blogs Facebook Page and the twitter feed for updates. 🙂

Thank you all again!

Love and hugs,




4 thoughts on “Jumping through hoops to get back to you – news & thank you”

  1. ((((MARIAH)))) Hugs to you, and your family. You are all in my prayers! Take care of each other and tell each other daily that you love one another!

    1. Thank you Sandy, it’s times like these that remind us that life is so precious and fragile, like when I was diagnosed with Lupus SLE and told I would be expected to live 10 years, at most (luckily things are more advanced with medicine now and I have well outlived my “death sentence” and can be expected to live a long life.) During these times, hugs are given out freely, love flows richly and things are said, like “I love you” frequently. No regrets will be there, if the worst happens.
      The times may be trying, but I am happy for the reminder and time to spend and treasure each moment, even if things are difficult to face.

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